For some odd reason, there is a certain percentage of the public that loves to hold grudges against those who they believe had done some kind of wrong upon them. Holding angst against the opposing party for a week or so is fine, but anything more than a month is simply a farce. If the reason behind the grudge relates to a certain death or even a life-changing event directly related to the person, then those grudges are justifiable. The grudge-bearer can hold these ill feelings for all they want, but they should also understand that these feelings are unhealthy for the body and mind. Sooner or later, these unwanted feelings will cause the individual more grief and a decreased quality of life, which could lead to other unwanted events like injury and death.
The only way for the grudge-bearer to gain any satisfaction is when the opposing party comes back to “apologize” for the perceived wrongdoing or suffers a devastating blow in one’s life. If the grudge-bearer percieves this apology as of goodwill, then he or she might be able to forgive the other party. However, one can simply overlook this apology as a faux means to an end, and still carry these ill feelings to the grave. By doing so, both members may clash against each other until the matter is resolved, either through compromise and mutual understanding or the permanent separation of the two parties. Separation can be done voluntarily, court martial, or by taking one’s life.
On the opposite side of the coin, the grudge could be so trivial that the supposed afflicted member could move on with life by casting away all connections with this individual and still bear minimal losses. If the opposing member offered a helping hand to the grudge-bearer with good intent and recieves retribution, then there is no reason why he or she should risk his well-being and sanity for an ungrateful person. This is espeically true when the ungrateful person happens to have little to no influence over the other person’s life. If he or she does have an integral role in one’s life, then he or she should reconsider new avenues for living one’s life or amend the current dismal issue.
In the event that the grudge-bearer has little or no impact on anybody’s life, only the one holding the grudge suffers while everyone else is enjoying the rest of their lives. The only saving grace for this individual is to learn how to forgive people and to recognize that these grudges might be a form of denial or have a relation to one’s past, traumatic or not.
All in all, these grudges must be dealt with swiftly to protect the wellbeing of oneself and surrounding public. If people want to hate without any concrete evidence, then let them be and move on with life. Nothing could be more frustrating and depressing than convincing a person who refuses to understand the current situation and watch them walk down the path of suffering.
Looking back onto 2012, I was able to accomplish some goals and scratching others off the list due to change of interest or more serious priorities emerging from within the family.
Linux is no longer on my list due to lack of interest and multiple unfortunate encounters with jaded elitists. My quest for finding the right Linux environment has ended after I wrote some simple Debian post net-install scripts. If my needs ever come unmet, I shall embark on my journey for more information.
On another note, I have not found the need to proclaim the word of Linux for only those who need Linux will find Linux. In other words, one will look for new solutions when the current solution has more consequences far outweigh the benefits (such as laziness). For those who are truly looking for an alternative to Windows and new to Linux, I would recommend Crunchbang Linux.
For the truly ambitious, I would recommend LinuxBBQ. The distribution comes in several flavors and will undoubtedly provide a comprehensive understanding of Debian, especially if one decides to use the base install as their starting point and persevere into “roasting” their own individualized environment. The learning curve might be steep and almost frightening, but it is definitely worth the effort. Robert Frost once said that the path less traveled has made all the difference.
Unsurprisingly, the majority of my 2012 year went straight to work and enriching my nursing career. So much time went into this that I only had time for food and sleep. If people do not understand why others do not have time for their requests, it is because everyone else is working hard for the money to make ends meet every month. Hopefully my life would settle down this year, but nobody can predict the future.
Goals for 2013:
- Continue the nursing profession
- Learn gardening
- Simplify my life
- Post more often on this blog.
Within the past week, I have been plagued with misfortune. A friendship was lost, a console and its save data broken and corrupted, a relative died, and a car crash in the family. As we all know it, the world moves on with disregard to the woes of the individual. Sympathy can sometimes help ease the pain, but it can also aggravate the victim. Empathy is more useful in this case, since both parties can relate to each other. As much as I want to blame myself and carry these pains to the grave, I ask the victims I have done wrong to forgive me as I would for those who have done me wrong. As I see it now, I must move forward into world and learn to prevent past mistakes and misfortunes to repeat itself from here on out. I bear no grudges against anyone, for they benefit nobody except for petty self-satisfaction.
New friendships are easy to make and easy to break. People mingle and find out that they like a lot of the same topics. As time progresses, disagreements and arguments arise. Every dispute arises new information about each person. One can choose to accept the other for what he or she is or completely disagree and break the friendship. The former decision requires patience, empathy, and willpower even if the other party lacks these qualities. Over time, the other party will gradually develop the qualities necessary to build a healthy and strong relationship. However, if there are numerous consecutive disagreements and failure to respect each other’s opinions, then the relationship will erode and the bridge of friendship will crumble. There are other circumstances where the friendship could immediately implode itself from just one argument.
The next most difficult task is repairing the bridge of friendship. If the bridge is still intact, there is hope in recovering the rest via compliments and empowerment. However, if the bridge is completely blown apart, then it might be too late to make any amends to the respective person. Both parties are severly hurt by one another’s actions and prefer to shut out any information from the other party. It is only by luck if one is able to have the other person hear him or her out and agree to give the relationship another chance. With persistence and acts of kindness, one might be able to make some progress. In the case of workplace situations, this will have to be done sooner than later if anyone wants to bring the misery to an end.
The worst situation is when both parties know that the relationship cannot be salvaged and irrecoverable. As much as one wants to be friends with the other, it is simply not possible. These scars can last forever, but they are more devastating in the workplace. For example, the termination of one’s employment from the company can scar any participating member for life, but moreso for the terminated employee. In addition to receiving the last blow to one’s ego and occupational security, He or she will face even more hardships trying to find a new job.